dislike the song even more! There’s always that risk it seems when you even
touch up on an original. I watched the pilot of the new Melrose Place with
poised industry-like snake eyes, let’s see how these empty tween jokers are
going to screw up my show.
They didn’t.
To my delight and apparently millions of others, the CW’s Melrose Place
rebooted rather nicely. Attracting some of the older scandalous loving fans,
while gathering a whole new set of even more scandalous loving ones. But
being an avid “older” scandal loving fan, I will speak as such, and from the heart
too! So watch your back…
My most favorite and beloved Syd (Laura Leighton) was back from the dead!
But how? She was killed on her wedding day, in front of the church while posing
for pictures in her wedding dress, run over by a car! I even saw her flip! That’s
pretty dead. Only for her to wind up stabbed and floating face down in the
infamous courtyard pool within the first 8 minutes. What?!
I was hooked man, I’m that easy and I guess not as cynical as I thought.
Syd’s apparently lifeless floating body discovered by a screaming Violet Foster
(Ashlee Simpson-Wentz), who is the “didn’t that girl just move in like 30 seconds
ago” country folk resident. She seems weird in that Mid-Western way and
actually resembles Syd A LOT. Plus during the ending collage of the show we
see her swipe Syd’s framed photo, from a make shift pool side altar all the
residents built in memory of Syd…weird.
touch up on an original. I watched the pilot of the new Melrose Place with
poised industry-like snake eyes, let’s see how these empty tween jokers are
going to screw up my show.
They didn’t.
To my delight and apparently millions of others, the CW’s Melrose Place
rebooted rather nicely. Attracting some of the older scandalous loving fans,
while gathering a whole new set of even more scandalous loving ones. But
being an avid “older” scandal loving fan, I will speak as such, and from the heart
too! So watch your back…
My most favorite and beloved Syd (Laura Leighton) was back from the dead!
But how? She was killed on her wedding day, in front of the church while posing
for pictures in her wedding dress, run over by a car! I even saw her flip! That’s
pretty dead. Only for her to wind up stabbed and floating face down in the
infamous courtyard pool within the first 8 minutes. What?!
I was hooked man, I’m that easy and I guess not as cynical as I thought.
Syd’s apparently lifeless floating body discovered by a screaming Violet Foster
(Ashlee Simpson-Wentz), who is the “didn’t that girl just move in like 30 seconds
ago” country folk resident. She seems weird in that Mid-Western way and
actually resembles Syd A LOT. Plus during the ending collage of the show we
see her swipe Syd’s framed photo, from a make shift pool side altar all the
residents built in memory of Syd…weird.
www.ambiente.us SEPTEMBER | SEPTIEMBRE 2009
“I LOVE love, just hate monogamy”
The “new “ Melrose Place premieres on the CW
by Armando Diaz Jr.
The bee-atch is back! Well at least a new one is, and she’s BI!
I have to say it often times pays to be completely clueless, or at the very least
unaware of a certain universe, then you can be more objective correct? I am
not a CW viewer, I am not a “90210” fan (neither then, nor now), and with
individuals like “Octo-Mom” getting their own shows, I don’t watch a lot of
reality television. That last one is just me hating on Octo-Mom like I hate on
those “silly” Kardashians, but I digress. It’s this economy.
Objective or not, economy or not, here comes Melrose Place for the 21st
century.
Scan if you must but this review is unique.
You know how Jessica Simpson used the chords and beats of John Mellencamp’s
“goody-goody” love anthem Jack & Diane? And she actually managed me to
“I LOVE love, just hate monogamy”
The “new “ Melrose Place premieres on the CW
by Armando Diaz Jr.
The bee-atch is back! Well at least a new one is, and she’s BI!
I have to say it often times pays to be completely clueless, or at the very least
unaware of a certain universe, then you can be more objective correct? I am
not a CW viewer, I am not a “90210” fan (neither then, nor now), and with
individuals like “Octo-Mom” getting their own shows, I don’t watch a lot of
reality television. That last one is just me hating on Octo-Mom like I hate on
those “silly” Kardashians, but I digress. It’s this economy.
Objective or not, economy or not, here comes Melrose Place for the 21st
century.
Scan if you must but this review is unique.
You know how Jessica Simpson used the chords and beats of John Mellencamp’s
“goody-goody” love anthem Jack & Diane? And she actually managed me to
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Violet’s scream alerts the hood, and we meet
them all. The “new” Alison and Billy with
seemingly less issues and more history, Riley
Richmond and Jonah Miller (played by Jessica
Lucas and Michael Rady). Riley already
coming off as annoying as possible by having
to “think about” adorable and creative’s
Jonah’s intense proposal after five years
because he doesn’t seem grown? Someone
throw Riley in the pool! I’ll hold her down. Do
you have any idea how hard it is to find a man like that little girl? And in
Southern California no less?? I hope my little sister is reading this.
Again Syd, why? Why did you end up like Brooke? I wonder if
Syd will haunt the pool and possess her ex-boyfriends too.
Ok so, Jonah’s kick ass 8 gig video card montage proposal is interrupted by
Violet’s scream. He and Riley run out half naked to see what’s up along with
local chef Auggie Kirkpatrick (played by Colin Egglesfield). What?! Ladies and
gentleman we have achieved a new level of…well…HOT. The jacket, the
motorcycle, the mystery we witness about him in the last 5 minutes gives him
that added darkness. Auggie reminds me of both Jake Hanson and Kyle
McBride. Remember the McBrides? Taylor McBride was yet one of the countless
zany females impregnated by the ultimate sperm bank, the good doctor himself,
Dr. Michael Mancini.
One of the doctor’s bastards lives in the building, imagine that? And was
maybe one of the last people to see Syd alive. The show actually kicks off with
David Breck (played by Shawn Sipos) making out with a random hot girl whilst
being TXT-ed wildly by Syd “this is serious, come now”-something. After some
informative flashbacks we learn Syd was sleeping with David to get closer to or
them all. The “new” Alison and Billy with
seemingly less issues and more history, Riley
Richmond and Jonah Miller (played by Jessica
Lucas and Michael Rady). Riley already
coming off as annoying as possible by having
to “think about” adorable and creative’s
Jonah’s intense proposal after five years
because he doesn’t seem grown? Someone
throw Riley in the pool! I’ll hold her down. Do
you have any idea how hard it is to find a man like that little girl? And in
Southern California no less?? I hope my little sister is reading this.
Again Syd, why? Why did you end up like Brooke? I wonder if
Syd will haunt the pool and possess her ex-boyfriends too.
Ok so, Jonah’s kick ass 8 gig video card montage proposal is interrupted by
Violet’s scream. He and Riley run out half naked to see what’s up along with
local chef Auggie Kirkpatrick (played by Colin Egglesfield). What?! Ladies and
gentleman we have achieved a new level of…well…HOT. The jacket, the
motorcycle, the mystery we witness about him in the last 5 minutes gives him
that added darkness. Auggie reminds me of both Jake Hanson and Kyle
McBride. Remember the McBrides? Taylor McBride was yet one of the countless
zany females impregnated by the ultimate sperm bank, the good doctor himself,
Dr. Michael Mancini.
One of the doctor’s bastards lives in the building, imagine that? And was
maybe one of the last people to see Syd alive. The show actually kicks off with
David Breck (played by Shawn Sipos) making out with a random hot girl whilst
being TXT-ed wildly by Syd “this is serious, come now”-something. After some
informative flashbacks we learn Syd was sleeping with David to get closer to or
| . |
| . |
get back at Michael for some reason. Hmm.
So David was possibly the last one seen with Syd and he’s already in LAPD
custody, but he didn’t even get beat! And the detective interrogating him
allowed way too much disrespect I’m sorry. David is free to go on a false alibi
issued by sultry, scheme-written-all-over-her face blonde Ella Simms (played by
Katie Cassidy). I judged Ella more than I did any other character, I have to say. I
thought she was going to be so typical and she just wasn’t. Internally I wasn’t
feeling her statement, which is the title of this article. But then I thought… that’s
why Ella’s there. She is there to do all the things I don’t want to do but end up
going through anyways to the 10th power. She has this obnoxious arrogance to
her, but an insecurity that you could see if you scratched at her like a Pick 3
ticket. Dark history and trouble abides here for sure. Ella’s innocence is amped
a little when she leaves the police station with David, they walk to her Mini, she’
s checking herself in the mirror and her face freezes in that little girl way. Who
pulls up? The good doctor, who calls out to his son, “Get in”! in that gentle
fatherly way.
Did I mention Dr. Mancini (Thomas Calabro) looks great! I am being very biased
but, he had me at Mercedes. A 2010 Mercedes SLS AMG, looking like a Klingon
Bird-Of-Prey mixed with a Delorian. Whooshing upward opening doors…that car
was sick! Ok anyways…
After some daddy-son bonding time, we still don’t know who David’s mother is
or what transpired between him and Syd Dr. Mancini now tells his son “get
out”! and we cue a beautiful downtown L.A. skyline sunset as David walks away
from that sweet car. I’m not going to trash talk a super expensive vehicle cause
I can’t afford it for sure, I won’t hate.
But I will hate on Octo-Mom and those “silly” caked-out Kardashians.
After seeing her incredible performance as the drug numbing, semi obsessive,
almost lesbian drill sergeant turned commander then martyr on Battlestar
So David was possibly the last one seen with Syd and he’s already in LAPD
custody, but he didn’t even get beat! And the detective interrogating him
allowed way too much disrespect I’m sorry. David is free to go on a false alibi
issued by sultry, scheme-written-all-over-her face blonde Ella Simms (played by
Katie Cassidy). I judged Ella more than I did any other character, I have to say. I
thought she was going to be so typical and she just wasn’t. Internally I wasn’t
feeling her statement, which is the title of this article. But then I thought… that’s
why Ella’s there. She is there to do all the things I don’t want to do but end up
going through anyways to the 10th power. She has this obnoxious arrogance to
her, but an insecurity that you could see if you scratched at her like a Pick 3
ticket. Dark history and trouble abides here for sure. Ella’s innocence is amped
a little when she leaves the police station with David, they walk to her Mini, she’
s checking herself in the mirror and her face freezes in that little girl way. Who
pulls up? The good doctor, who calls out to his son, “Get in”! in that gentle
fatherly way.
Did I mention Dr. Mancini (Thomas Calabro) looks great! I am being very biased
but, he had me at Mercedes. A 2010 Mercedes SLS AMG, looking like a Klingon
Bird-Of-Prey mixed with a Delorian. Whooshing upward opening doors…that car
was sick! Ok anyways…
After some daddy-son bonding time, we still don’t know who David’s mother is
or what transpired between him and Syd Dr. Mancini now tells his son “get
out”! and we cue a beautiful downtown L.A. skyline sunset as David walks away
from that sweet car. I’m not going to trash talk a super expensive vehicle cause
I can’t afford it for sure, I won’t hate.
But I will hate on Octo-Mom and those “silly” caked-out Kardashians.
After seeing her incredible performance as the drug numbing, semi obsessive,
almost lesbian drill sergeant turned commander then martyr on Battlestar
Galactica, I see beautiful Stephanie Jacobsen. This is when I realized, ok this
sh** is serious. And they gave her an Asian last name! Alright! She’s from New
Zealand and she does a great job about her accent, so even extra kudos. An
Asian last name…here’s to ethnicity! Roll your eyes Pat Buchanan and Lou
Dobbs! According to the National Geographic channel we’re all the same so…
Stephanie Jacobsen plays super sexy young resident doctor, Lauren Yung.
Stephanie works a lot, doesn’t go on dates, hangs out with Riley (ugh), and takes
advice from a teenager (screaming Violet) on turning tricks no less! Well she
has to pay for her tuition somehow, I mean her dad got laid off “like half of the
country” she states. But she lives here and is somehow getting her roommate to
cover her West Hollywood rent at 4616. But her roommate is Auggie…isn’t that
an interesting name? Ok Auggie must own the place and has gone into
foreclosure without telling her so this is why Stephanie is not homeless right now,
but I know Syd being the “landlord” is involved in there somehow…maybe.
C’mon folks it’s “so Melrose”. Just stay with it, we could all use
an escape now and again. Somehow I could hear a Bible
-beater in my head, you want escape go to church! Lordy, lordy.
Within (1) episode adorable Stephanie goes from good little resident doctor to
full out prostitute! But you feel for her, at least I do. What would YOU do in that
situation? That’s why I automatically loved Ella, woman puts it out there and
makes no apologies. But you still see the humanity in her and her obvious
longing for Jonah. Ok Ella…you trip Riley, make sure she falls in the pool, and I’ll
accidentally knock a connected floor lamp in. That happened to Amanda once
while she was in a hot tub mackin’ with Dr. Mancini. Crazy Kimmy was holding
the lamp! Good old insane Dr. Kimberly Shaw, those were the days. These kids
betta’ recognize.
BTW, Jane (Josie Bissett) and Jo (Daphne Zuniga) are making re-appearance
cameos.
sh** is serious. And they gave her an Asian last name! Alright! She’s from New
Zealand and she does a great job about her accent, so even extra kudos. An
Asian last name…here’s to ethnicity! Roll your eyes Pat Buchanan and Lou
Dobbs! According to the National Geographic channel we’re all the same so…
Stephanie Jacobsen plays super sexy young resident doctor, Lauren Yung.
Stephanie works a lot, doesn’t go on dates, hangs out with Riley (ugh), and takes
advice from a teenager (screaming Violet) on turning tricks no less! Well she
has to pay for her tuition somehow, I mean her dad got laid off “like half of the
country” she states. But she lives here and is somehow getting her roommate to
cover her West Hollywood rent at 4616. But her roommate is Auggie…isn’t that
an interesting name? Ok Auggie must own the place and has gone into
foreclosure without telling her so this is why Stephanie is not homeless right now,
but I know Syd being the “landlord” is involved in there somehow…maybe.
C’mon folks it’s “so Melrose”. Just stay with it, we could all use
an escape now and again. Somehow I could hear a Bible
-beater in my head, you want escape go to church! Lordy, lordy.
Within (1) episode adorable Stephanie goes from good little resident doctor to
full out prostitute! But you feel for her, at least I do. What would YOU do in that
situation? That’s why I automatically loved Ella, woman puts it out there and
makes no apologies. But you still see the humanity in her and her obvious
longing for Jonah. Ok Ella…you trip Riley, make sure she falls in the pool, and I’ll
accidentally knock a connected floor lamp in. That happened to Amanda once
while she was in a hot tub mackin’ with Dr. Mancini. Crazy Kimmy was holding
the lamp! Good old insane Dr. Kimberly Shaw, those were the days. These kids
betta’ recognize.
BTW, Jane (Josie Bissett) and Jo (Daphne Zuniga) are making re-appearance
cameos.
I am a very satisfied and hopeful viewer for this show. Even Jack and Diane
listening goody-goodies have a dark side. We all do to some extent, and
Melrose Place serves that up in an explosion of audio-visual mobile uploading
candy delight.
Those empty tween jokers, they’re pretty brilliant.
Along with a sexy first episode CW soundtrack, the who done it has been set!
Why is Violet so weird? Who stabbed Syd? Is she really dead? Can Ella really
be a publicist and an agent at once, and if she can, how does she have time to
be bisexual? Will Stephanie be able to pay her rent and stop borrowing shoes
from Riley? (ugh) Do Auggie, Jonah, and David work out at the same gym and
do they go at the same time? Can I get asked to get into Dr. Mancini’s ride?
And will Amanda come back? Love rumors, love Melrose
- Armando Diaz
Melrose Place | Tuesday nights @ 9pm EST on the CW.
Copyright 2009| Ambiente. Do not reproduce without prior authorization.
listening goody-goodies have a dark side. We all do to some extent, and
Melrose Place serves that up in an explosion of audio-visual mobile uploading
candy delight.
Those empty tween jokers, they’re pretty brilliant.
Along with a sexy first episode CW soundtrack, the who done it has been set!
Why is Violet so weird? Who stabbed Syd? Is she really dead? Can Ella really
be a publicist and an agent at once, and if she can, how does she have time to
be bisexual? Will Stephanie be able to pay her rent and stop borrowing shoes
from Riley? (ugh) Do Auggie, Jonah, and David work out at the same gym and
do they go at the same time? Can I get asked to get into Dr. Mancini’s ride?
And will Amanda come back? Love rumors, love Melrose
- Armando Diaz
Melrose Place | Tuesday nights @ 9pm EST on the CW.
Copyright 2009| Ambiente. Do not reproduce without prior authorization.
